Several years ago I spoke at a private all-girls school. The girls were in 5th-8th grade. After my assemblies the head of school wanted me to meet with the girls in small groups to discuss my presentation. As a youth speaker, this is my favorite thing to do after I speak so that people can ask me questions and share things that resonated with them. Kids usually open up a lot in smaller groups.
In the first group, I met with, we sat in a semi-circle and I went around to each of the girls asking them to share their thoughts on my talk or ask me a question. The fourth or fifth girl to share began to speak and then began to cry, pouring her heart out about how she does not feel like she fits in at this school. All of the other girls and I were very focused on her and someone got her some tissues. She continued by saying the reason she feels out of place in the school is that she is adopted. We all listened intently and after she finished I paused before I offered her some encouragement and things to think about.
When I turned to the girl sitting next to her to share that girl turned to the first girl and said “I know how you feel, I’m adopted too.” I almost fell out of my chair. These two girls were sitting maybe 2 inches apart! There was a kind of a sigh of relief in the room and you could tell that all the girls were affected by this connection. Again they were sitting two inches apart. You never know who you are sitting next to and who you can impact.
I made a decision many years ago to become a youth speaker. I am extremely vulnerable when I speak to show kids that it is safe for them to be vulnerable also. A few months after my visit to the school I received an email from the head of school telling me that the two girls were inseparable and had become best friends. The next time you sit down next to someone you don’t know perhaps take a moment to pause and think of this story.